Even more grateful for the presence of God in my life

February 15, 2012

Tags: favours of the founder of Opus Dei I returned to college after having our children to study nursing. During the time I was in school my husband lost his job and though he eventually found work we spent much of our savings on living expenses and my education. Though I earned excellent grades and had related healthcare work experience I was unable to find a job as a new graduate. I applied for hundreds of jobs even those I did not want and was not suited for. I could not understand why I could not find work despite my best efforts. Month after month passed without a single call and I grew more depressed, distressed and fearful about our future. I began to wonder if I had made a mistake in returning to school or becoming a nurse. Why had I been called to nursing if there was no place for me? I felt broken and confused and angry much of the time. My insecurity led to profound anxiety that permeated every area of my life. I was ready to give up but realized there was no way to do so. I had to find work!
I began praying the Novena to St Josemaria Escriva for work. Immediately I felt my heart soften and fill with love, release and relief as I knew I was not alone! I was so profoundly moved I let loose a flood of tears. I stopped praying for what I thought I wanted in a job and began praying for the intercession of St Josemaria to allow my heart to be open to guidance, that I might seek and find the work I was intended to do where I could be most effective and do the greatest good. Each day I began to feel a bit better - more positive, lighter and brighter. It was the daily prayer and the writings and words of St Josemaria that resonated within me that lifted me and returned me to faith. My depression began lifting. Even though I had not found a job I no longer felt so hopeless. During the nine days of the novena I faced some additional challenges, but because I felt held up in spirit I was able to carry on and not lose faith. At times if I felt shaken or low I would read his writings and try to incorporate these truths into my own daily life. The more I did so the lighter my burden, though nothing externally or in my circumstance had changed. Truly it eased my suffering, but also it prepared me, for unknown to me there was tremendous hope on my horizon!
I finally got a call for an interview for a nursing position I had desperately wanted and was ideally suited for! It had taken 3 months to be called. Yet it had been in the previous weeks I had petitioned for intercession and it had been those weeks that my heart had been lifted. I was able to walk into the interviews feeling peaceful and joyous. I prayed that the light of the Holy Spirit would shine from me as it lit up my heart so my interviewers might see the best in me and know that I would be an asset. Had they called weeks or months sooner I would not have been prepared and only the shadow and gloom of my emptiness would have shown instead of the light of faith. Instead I felt full and beaming with God's love and His purpose for me to serve others through the gifts He has given me. If ever I felt nervous I would call on St Josemaria to help guide me and I would instantly feel calm and excited rather than nervous. Best of all I felt I could be myself. Not just my regular self but my very best self.
I got the job and I love it! It took almost exactly ONE full year to find it. As difficult as it has been the experience has brought me closer to God and keeps me close still. I feel so grateful to have such a job, but also feel purposeful, knowing I am helping others and serving God. I have used this as an opportunity to make efforts to be the best I can to be positive and warm and work with both love purpose and a good attitude. I feel so blessed! Each day I am so full of gratitude that my joy is unbounded and it has spread far from the initial area of my work but to all areas of my life. While I am so grateful to have such a wonderful nursing job and the security it helps provide my family, I am even more grateful to feel the presence of God back in my life! The more gratitude, the more joy. How perfect!
I feel with great faith that it was the intercession of St Josemaria that helped me to not only find work (and not just ANY work but work I am best suited for, with people I work well with) but to open my heart and find my way back to Our Father and the everyday joy in my life. So many blessings!
V. W, USA